Sunday, August 19, 2012

Dear Jackson

Dear Jackson,

Tomorrow you will be three.  Three.  How can you possibly be that old already?  I swear we just brought you home from the hospital last week.  My dad (Baba) always told me that I grew up too quickly and I would kind of laugh at him.  I get it now.  Your own babies grow up way too quickly.  Don't get me wrong though, watching you (and your sister) grow up is the most amazing experience your Daddy and I will ever have.

In this past year you have really become a joy.  Not that you weren't before, but this year you really let us see what makes you, you.  In January you started to put together simple sentences and say words with more than one syllable...and you haven't slowed down since.  I love hearing your thoughts and questions.  You are incredibly smart.  Your memory is impeccable - I'm a little jealous.  You are a perfectionist.  You are sweet, tender, and one of the most loving human beings I have ever come in contact with.  You are fiercely independent.  You think for yourself.  You ask "Why?" instead of just following along - please don't ever lose that quality.  Even though sometimes I've heard "Why?" one hundred times by 10:00am and I'm ready to go crazy, I don't want you to lose that desire to get to the root of the problem/situation/life...please stay curious.  You are inquisitive about how the world works and why it works the way it does.  You love nature.  You love to watch and study nature.  You melt my heart.

Two was my favorite year for you so far.  You became a little person that could participate in life and we had so much fun together.   But I also liked two because you were still my baby.  My sweet, precious baby boy that sometimes I wish would never grow up...but not really because every day you grow a little more and all the changes I see before me excite me for the person you are becoming.

You continue to love books and reading.  You love all big, noisy things that move - trains, buses, cars, trucks, construction vehicles, boats.  You love tools and helping Daddy.  You love your sister and you try so hard to help and teach her...and to be patient with her as she struggles to keep up with you.  You love to help cook and I'm impressed by how good you are in the kitchen.  You are great at puzzles.  You love to build things.  You love play-doh, coloring, and stickers.  You love to watch the trains in our neighborhood.  You love sports.  You love to be loud and rowdy, just like a little boy should be.  You love to cuddle.  I think you're starting to be afraid of the dark.  I think that means your imagination is really starting to develop - you come up with wonderful stories and get really involved in your own little world when you play.  You are potty trained now and you did it all on your own, at your own pace...and I expected nothing different from you.  You can count to 12, but then you jump to 14, 16, 18, 21.  It makes your Daddy and me smile everytime.  We know when you're ready, you'll fill in the gaps.  You love numbers and counting.  You still love noodles, but your other favorites are cinnamon rolls (I made some for your birthday breakfast), pears, salad, and bacon.  You love to help in the garden and are incredibly excited about the pumpkins growing out there now.  Your favorite colors are green and orange.  You love band-aids.  You sleep with Froggy, Ivan Jack, and your firetruck quilt (you call it "firefire sheet") every night.  This summer, we've gone to the farmer's market every Thursday and you call it the "Froggy market".  When you are figuring out how big something is, you ask if it's "big or super big like Daddy?".   When you talk about how you're growing you love to say "I'm a big boy, not super big like Daddy, but I'm getting there!".  You loved the beach this year, especially jumping in the waves with Daddy. 

Yes, your mommy has tears in her eyes while she types this.  If I type a letter to you every year on your birthday, I'm pretty sure I'll have tears in eyes each time.  Being a mommy and watching your babies grow up is bittersweet.  They grow into wonderful, inspiring human beings, but it's hard to see how quickly it happens.  You've taught me so much, sometimes I wish you weren't growing so quickly or that I could have a "re-do" on certain days/times of your life.  By the time I realize how I should have done things, that phase of our life is already over - and of course with your sister only being 14 months behind you, I didn't figure most things out in time to do them better with her either.  Some days it's hard to not be able to protect you as much as I could in the first days/months/years.  It's hard to know you're one year closer to being a grown-up and moving out.  Three years has passed so quickly, I know that before I know it you'll be off to live life on your own.  But it's ok.  It just means your mommy love you immensely, no matter what - don't worry, you'll understand one day when you have babies of your own.

My sweet, precious, perfect baby boy (you will always be my baby boy, even when you're married with babies of your own), you are PERFECT exactly the way you are.  Don't worry, perfection doesn't mean you can't get into trouble, because you do and you just means your Daddy and I are the most blessed parents in the world to have you as our son.  You are the son we always dreamed of and we love you to the moon and back.

Happy birthday Jackson Blair.

Mommy (and Daddy)

Yes, you will always be this little snuggle bug to me.